Movie Review: Room 237 (2012)

You know, I love The Shining as much as every other horror movie fan or Stephen King fan or just plain old awesome movie fan. Stanley Kubrick was an oddball genius who created films that many people describe as "perfect." So taking into consideration Kubrick's careful filmmaking and attention to detail, is it possible that he had some much deeper meanings in mind when he created one of the most popular movies of all time?

Juli Kearns's Overlook map

The 2012 documentary Room 237 explores this issue, with interviews with several Shining fans giving their different interpretations and theories into what the movie represents. The interviewees are not seen on camera themselves nor are they given any kind of credentials other than the fact that they've obviously watched The Shining way, way, way, way too many times. Their theories are presented to the audience by way of clips from the film and other footage that sort of pertains to what they are talking about. 

This documentary was... hilarious. What, did you think I was going to say "fascinating" or something? No. If anything, I'll give the movie credit for being one of the best comedies I have seen in a while. Had me laughing the whole time. I've always known that there were some Shining fans out there who took the movie a tad bit too seriously and all, but this was my first time actually listening to them talk about this shit. Wait, I lied - I'd heard the stuff about the Native American genocide metaphor. It was funny to actually see them try to prove it to me. Anyway, though I admire the interviewees obvious dedication and perseverance, not a single one of their theories even slightly convinced me that The Shining is any more than it appears to be.

The conspiracy theorists actually do a good job of showing the "proof" of their ideas, even though they are all things that nobody else would have thought of... ever. They all say things like, "if you go frame by frame," or "you really have to look hard to find this one" when talking about their little Kubrick subliminal messages. I've seen the movie a pretty good number of times, okay? I never paid attention to what was in the background, granted. So here's a question for you - why would such a celebrated directed who obviously loved film put all the so-called "important" stuff in the background of his movie? Where did all this conspiracy shit even come from in the first place? Why can't the brilliance of The Shining just be that it is fucking awesome?

Seriously, the things they bring up about the movie are simply laughable. A baking soda can that is - gasp! - seen twice in the movie? A poster of a skier is really a depiction of a minotaur? The window in Ullman's office is improbable? Okay, yeah, I can kinda see where that one is coming from if I was anal retentive about architecture and spacial relations, but I'M NOT. Every time they mention some hidden message or whatever that looks to an outsider like a simple continuity error, the comment is always implied that Kubrick would never make such a mistake and that it has to mean something deeper. They saw what they wanted to see, and that's it. I'll give them that Kubrick was meticulous but not infallible. Continuity errors can happen to anyone. The world is an imperfect place.

My favorite theory was the one about how Kubrick used The Shining to subliminally tell the world that he staged the Apollo moon landing footage. Now that is just downright silly. It would be cool if it were true but you're really going off the deep end with that one, aren't you, sport? Okay, yes, I've always been a little curious about Danny's Apollo 11 sweater. Thought maybe it was just a 70s/80s thing that I wasn't around for and don't understand. There were lots of weird fashion trends going on then. Anyway, this is certainly the wildest theory to be represented in Room 237 and one that they thankfully did not spend that much time indulging.

In a weird way I liked the thing the one guy presented about watching the filming forwards and backwards at the same time, superimposed over one another. Yes, it does seem like you get some cool images from doing this, but seriously - stop and think about that for a second. Think about how much time and effort would have to be put into the filming and editing of that movie to make that happen like you think it's supposed to. It's damn near impossible. So that theory is definitely out for me.

Bah, if I go on thinking about this stuff anymore, I'll probably start to believe some of it myself. Room 237 is definitely something you all need to check out - whether you think you might agree with these fanatics or just laugh at them like I did. I really hate to be harsh, but it was sooooo difficult for me to even try to take any of this foolishness seriously. Maybe I'm just not as much of a deep thinker as these dudes are.

My Book Sale Haul! Yes, There is Stephen King!

So, as I was sharing with another blogger not too long ago, every year in March my local library puts on this huge, 4 day long used book sale. Literally, THOUSANDS of books for usually no more than a dollar (hardbacks are two dollars). Of course I go every year and stock myself up on paperbacks that I can read at work and see what other goodies I can find.

At this awesome book sale, a mere $22 got me 19 paperbacks and 2 hardbacks (I didn't realize until I got home that they miscounted - whoops).

Totally could've picked out more, but the bag was getting heavy and it was hot in there and there were people all around and I just wanted to go home.

I'm going through a Michael Connelly phase right now so I got some more stuff by him; also some Dean Koontz, a Brian Keene, and two Peter Straubs, which I'm really excited about because I've only ever read The Talisman. Would have loved to find Ghost Story, but no such luck.

Not gonna lie, though. My first intention when I get through the door is to scope out Stephen King hardbacks, preferably first editions of the older stuff. I've been somewhat lucky in the past with finding the ones I want, but as you can see from this year, either someone grabbed them up first or there just weren't as many SK hardbacks available. I even shared my frustration with a fellow shopper who wanted to see the copy of The Dead Zone that I put back (beat-up dust jacket and it was just a book club edition - nah). So the SK haul wasn't as good this year.

Not that I'm not happy with what I got. I got the hardback of The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon; a nice first printing paperback of Dolores Claiborne; that awesome dog's mouth cover paperback for Cujo (it's more beat-up than I would usually like, but I couldn't resist); AND the complete set of The Green Mile serial novels (my only copy has them all in one). Plus, I picked up copies of Hearts in Atlantis and Cell because I only have those in hardback, and The Drawing of the Three because at some point I know I'm going to have to read The Dark Tower books.

One find that I thought was pretty cool was this first edition - I think - of The Silence of the Lambs:

It's a cool cover and in good condition so I was stoked about this. Kinda makes me want to read the whole series again.

Anyway, that's my haul. I might go back again tomorrow because they're going to keep putting out new stuff until the last day (on that day, you just fill a box with books and it's only $5). My little SK bookshelf has now, like all my other bookshelves, gotten too small for my crazy book shopping. If a fire ever started in the office of my apartment, I'd be fucked.

Anthology Quest: Tales from the Darkside: The Movie (1990)

Watching V/H/S a few weeks ago and now catching up on Tales from the Darkside, a movie I've been wanting to see for a long while now, I feel the need to dive into the often odd world of the horror anthology. I've added some classic ones, and some new ones, to my queue and the anthology quest will continue. First up (obviously) is this fantastic little piece of awesomeness from 1990 based on a TV series that I've never seen. Will look into it.

The wraparound story involves a seemingly normal professional woman driving home with some groceries, going into the kitchen, and handing some cookies to the boy she's got in a cage. She plans to cook him and serve him at a dinner party that night, but the boy tries to stall her by reading her three stories from a book she has given him. Why she would be conned into hearing stories she already knows - "Tales from the Darkside" is apparently her favorite book from childhood - doesn't really matter because the stories are awesome anyway. 

Deborah Harry of Blondie and Videodrome fame is our Hansel and Gretel-inspired witch, and she plays the somewhat small role with ease and just the right sense of humor to set the tone for the rest of the stories. A tiny Matthew Lawrence is the poor newspaper boy destined for the oven and he doesn't have that hard of a job in this movie, which therefore makes him kinda indistinguishable from another early 90s kid. I liked this wraparound story a lot and was interested in it as a feature story itself, even if the ending was predictable. Well, not totally predictable because these are supposed to be "tales from the darkside" and they could have taken the more dark approach where she really did cook the kid in the oven, but I wasn't counting on that. Anyway, it's a cute story to weave between the following three very different stories

"Lot 249" is the first story told and contains the most star-studded cast of the whole thing. Steve Buscemi, Julianne Moore, and Christian Slater join for this tale of mistreated college boy (played by Buscemi, obviously) who brings a mummy back to life to exact his revenge. I must point out that I love me a screen wipe for a transition, so I was kinda giddy to see them used a few times here. Always makes things more fun. Slater is strangely not annoying as he usually is and actually gives a great performance in his scene with Buscemi tied to a chair and Slater slicing a mummy up with an electric bread carving knife thing. This short also includes a quite yicky death when the mummy does a crude brain extraction on a guy by shoving a needle up his nose. Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew.

The ending to me almost screamed "ghoulishly funny Tales from the Crypt" ending - I couldn't help but expect the Cryptkeeper to be in the next shot, laughing and delivering a cheesy one-liner - but it has got to be the perfect ending for this particular story. 

"Cat from Hell" is the next story on the menu and one that I was quite familiar with because it is based on a Stephen King short story. An elderly pharmaceutical tycoon hires a hit man to murder his cat, whom the man claims has murdered his whole family and has him next on the list. Does Stephen King like or hate cats? They always seem to be kind of evil in his stories. Me? I love kitties so this was a fun story for me to finally see on the big screen, despite already knowing the oddball story and conclusion. You just haven't seen an awesome horror story until you've seen a full-grown cat crawl out of dead man's mouth.

Lots of fun here from both King and George Romero, who adapted the story. I really enjoyed the parts where the hit man is chasing the cat around the mansion - although he might have killed it a bit sooner if he would have stopped taunting it for a minute and actually shot it. As if it could actually hear him, you know. Anyway, the ending is of course the best part about this short. Completely unbelievable and ridiculous but so freaking hilarious at the same time. 

The last story is "Lover's Vow." I wasn't sold on this one at first. I thought it was too boring to be the final short in this anthology because it was more mellow and less exciting and fun as the rest of the stories, but it grew on me by the end. A man, Preston, sees his friend killed by a winged creature (turns out to be a gargoyle) which then speaks to him and tells him that it will not Preston if he promises to never tell anyone that he saw it. That same night, Preston runs into a stranger named Carola whom he immediately falls in love with and seems to save him from his miserable life and the memory of that night. Doesn't really take a genius to figure out that Carola is really the gargoyle in disguise. Sorry if I spoiled the surprise.

I still kind of think that this one is a bit boring, but I also believe that it was a nice way to round out the other two stories which were much more kitschy or tongue-in-cheek. Lover's Vow was more romantic, or as romantic as a horror tale can be, and had a very heartfelt ending. There are some nice creature effects for the gargoyles here. Which reminds me, KNB is responsible for all the effects in the film, and I love them so I gotta give them their props. You guys rule.

So, as a horror anthology, Tales from the Darkside is pretty great. The three stories, plus the wraparound, all compliment each other well with each one standing out for different reasons. Big thumbs up! I'm digging it, and I can't wait to dig into some more anthologies.

Michele Recommends: The Mammoth Book of Body Horror (2012)

Yeah, dudes. Horror books. They're almost as awesome as the movies. Almost.

So anyways, when I ducked into a Barnes and Noble a few months ago looking for some books by particular authors that they didn't have which is why I don't like going to Barnes and Noble... I found this. The Mammoth Book of Body Horror. I've seen a lot of these Mammoth Book[s] of Whatever around but I don't think I need to explain why this particular one caught my eye.

So after I'm done going all "Hmmmm..." over the cover and the impressive list of authors upon it, I open up the book to look at the table of contents, which is as thus:

Transformation by Mary Shelley

The Tell-Tale Heart by Edgar Allan Poe

Herbert West - Reanimator by H.P. Lovecraft

Who Goes There? by John W. Campbell

The Fly by George Langelaan

'Tis the Season to be Jelly by Richard Matheson

Survivor Type by Stephen King

The Body Politic by Clive Barker

The Chaney Legacy by Robert Bloch

The Other Side by Ramsey Campbell

Fruiting Bodies by Brian Lumley

Freaktent by Nancy A. Collins

Region of the Flesh by Richard Christian Matheson

Walking Wounded by Michael Marshall Smith

Changes by Neil Gaiman

Others by James Herbert

The Look by Christopher Fowler

Residue by Alice Henderson

Dog Days by Graham Masterton

Black Box by Gemma Files

The Soaring Dead by Simon Clark

Polyp by Barbie Wilde

Almost Forever by David Moody

Butterfly by Axelle Carolyn

Sticky Eye by Conrad Williams

Well, blow me down! The last fifteen or so were kind of lost on me, but I didn't care because I knew I was going to buy the book just for three specific stories that I've always wanted to read - "Herbert West - Reanimator," "The Fly," and "Who Goes There?" (the story that The Thing is based on). And they were all awesome, and it is very nice to have them in one collection instead of three different ones.

Many of the other stories were nice surprises, as well. I must say that Richard Matheson's " 'Tis the Sesaon to be Jelly" was my favorite out of all of them. People might read that one and not know what the hell is going on but I totally got it and thought it was a brilliant way to present the story. "The Body Politic" by Mr. Awesome Voice Clive Barker is a very subtly funny, but simultaneously serious story about when a man's hands literally rebel against him and the rest of his body.

As for the rest of the stories, here's what you have in store for you if you read it: Robert Bloch pens an interesting yarn about Lon Chaney; Nancy Collins freaks us out with a story about a photographer who looks for circus freaks; James Herbert gives a teasing look at the "Others"; Christopher Fowler shows how grotesque and dangerous fashion can be; Graham Masterson tells a doggedly romantic and weird tale about love and revenge; and Barbie Wilde introduces us to bowels gone bad (no, seriously). 

So, if you body horror fans need something to pass the time at the doctor's office or on your lunch break, then I think The Mammoth Book of Body Horror could be for you. I may sound like somebody is paying me to say all this, but it's totally true. Some real gems in this collection, classic and not, and I enjoyed the heck out of it.

Another Look at Pet Sematary

I've always loved both the book and film versions of Pet Sematary, as any awesome horror fan should, but just recently I reread the book and then watched the movie again. And it's weird, but it wasn't until this last trip to Ludlow, Maine with the Creeds that I finally realized what Pet Sematary is.

On the back of my terribly tattered older copy of the book is a quote from a Publishers Weekly review that states that Pet Sematary (keep your pants on, spellcheck... the misspelling is intended) is "the most frightening book Stephen King has ever written." Truthfully, I've never agreed with this hyperbole before. I was always, like, 'What's the biggie? It's just about bringing pets and people back to life via an Indian burial ground! There's scarier shit out there than that.' But now I know - no, there's not. This book is absolutely horrific and I can't believe it's taken this long for it to really hit me. And my revelation is probably not news to anybody else who has also read the book, but I think I had to look at it in a different context than I had before to really get it.

Pet Sematary is so frightening because it is about the complete destruction of an innocent family. Duh, right? But I think now that that is a really important fact to keep in mind when you're thinking about what's happening on screen or while you're reading the book. It's about a family being completely annihilated by horrific violence and evil. King's stories usually include ordinary people in extraordinary situations, but this is a family.

And what really sunk this thought into my head was comparing the Creeds to my sister's family. She has two boys - one is eight years old and one is just about to turn two, the same age as Gage Creed. Having no children of my own, they're the ones I think about when I have to deal with this kind of stuff in movies or books, and thinking about the events in Pet Sematary happening to them chills me to the bone. It terrifies and horrifies me to no fucking end. Imagining my little nephew, cute as a button, running into the road, laughing his adorable laugh, not seeing a huge tanker truck barreling toward him about to end his short life? Imagining how inconsolable my sister and brother-in-law would be? Gah, I can't even think about it now.

Though the novel ends rather ambiguously with Rachel coming back to Louis from the dead, I'm not assuming any kind of happy ending here. I think it's safe to say that Rachel either killed Louis, or Louis killed her and then himself. Little Ellie is the only one left alive, but I'd say she probably lives out the rest of her days in a padded room, rocking back and forth with foam coming out of her mouth, muttering things about the Pet Sematary and Oz the Gweat and Tewwible.

King has said that many of his story ideas come from asking the question what if? And the idea behind Gage's death came from the almost exact incident happening to King when his son was a child. The boy was playing with a kite and started running off toward the road, which had trucks constantly blazing past their house. King ran after him, hearing a truck coming not far away. His son thankfully did not get hit, but that what if? question stayed with him. I'd always known this story and the fact that it's one of the reasons King always felt that he had "gone too far" with Pet Sematary - even he has said that the novel is the most frightening one he has ever written because the story hit too close to home.

I understand now, Stephen, I truly do. These macabre and unspeakable things are not things that you ever want to come near the people you love - the people you love more than yourself - and I'm not just talking about the gruesome idea of turning a two-year-old into a murderous zombie. No one should have to bury a child, or even a beloved pet, so far before their time. The grief that Louis Rachel, and Ellie have when Gage dies is powerful, as is the guilt that Jud Crandall has for setting all this in motion.

"The most frightening book Stephen King has ever written." I  don't think it means frightening in a "Boo!" way at all, but more like an idea that scares you to the core and hits you where it hurts the most. I may have scoffed at this simple review of Pet Sematary before, but bringing this story closer to my heart, with the image of my sweet little nephew in mind, I have to say that I completely agree with the statement now.

Random Stephen King-ness: Needful Things (Viking, 1991)

Needful Things has always held a special place in my heart because it was the first Stephen King book I ever read. Well, it was the first one I ever read all the way through - I was about 11 years old when I tried to read Pet Sematary but soon gave up on it because of immature frustration. Since then, Needful Things has remained one of my favorites of King's novels. According to the top ten list I made for David over at Talk Stephen King, it is number 4, and I think that is the perfect place for this under-appreciated novel.

Needful Things is the last major story in King's string of tales taking place in the sinister fictional town of Castle Rock, Maine, where there have been many horrific occurrences that continually add to the town's evilness. The latest foe is a demon disguised as a man named Leland Gaunt who opens a new store in Castle Rock called Needful Things. Gaunt seems to have just what each resident wants the most, and he'll give it to you for a fair price. Somehow knowing all the townspeople's deepest secrets, Gaunt pits one person against another by having them play pranks on random people, until the seemingly innocent fun turns nothing short of deadly.

The first thing I love about this book is the prologue. The first page only has a single sentence on it - "You've been here before" - and then reads as if an old-timer resident is telling a new-comer a bit about the town and its people, and the new store that's opening up on Main Street. The reader is introduced to the backgrounds of some residents and their rivalries and lets them know that things are about to get bad in this town, that "a storm is on the way" - which proves to be true both figuratively and literally. The epilogue reads the same way and begins with the same phrase. Gaunt has been defeated and run out of Castle Rock, but according to this, he's starting up new business in Junction City, Iowa (and mentions Sam Peebles - the main character from the horrifying novella "The Library Policeman").

"You've been here before." It took me a bit of thinking to figure out the meaning behind that, and what I get from it is simply that people are the same everywhere. Gaunt has been peddling his wares and stealing people's souls since the dawn of time basically, but the people of Castle Rock are nothing special to him because he's probably seen it all before. Their trivial fights with one another may seem unique and specific to certain people but at the core it's the same old story - jealousy, greed, revenge, prejudice.

The second thing I love about this book is the characters. Needful Things is one of those King novels that has a ton of characters to keep straight and get to know. By this time, though, I think King had become a master at organizing his novels in a way where each character could have his or her story told and not make it confusing to the reader. It's easy to pick who the really important characters are in this story - Alan Pangborn, Polly Chalmers, Danforth Keeton, and Leland Gaunt are the ones that I would identify as the most central to the story. Pangborn is one of two Castle Rock natives who make a reappearance from two previous King stories. Sheriff Pangborn is the successor of George Bannerman, who first appeared in The Dead Zone, utilizing John Smith's psychic visions to capture the Castle Rock Strangler, and then came back again in Cujo only to be killed by the rabid dog at the end. Pangborn's involvement in the unusual case of Thad Beaumont in The Dark Half may have messed with his head a lot, but it no doubt made him stronger and more able to deal with the evil Leland Gaunt. In fact, Thad's sparrows and Cujo the rabid dog are tools that Alan uses against Gaunt in their final (if rather anticlimactic) battle - in the form of his famous shadow puppets. This was one detail that I really enjoyed about Needful Things, and thought it brought a real finality to the Castle Rock saga - along with the fact that most of the town was blown up at the end. The other Castle Rock townie to return is the resident bad boy Ace Merrill, now older but definitely not wiser. Though he plays a big role in carrying out Gaunt's master plan for Castle Rock, his character is no different than what you remember from "The Body" and he never changes and then he dies, so that's it for Ace.

I think what I love most about Needful Things though is the originality of the story and the appeal of Gaunt's sadistically fun plan for people to plan pranks on others. I can just imagine Stephen King standing in front of a corkboard with push pins and strings - constructing the web of who's fighting with who and who plays the pranks that set them off. The supernatural element of the novel is somewhat downplayed, so that the story can focus more on the characters and the effect that Gaunt's tricks are having on them. Yes, Gaunt is a demon who steals souls, and seems to know just about everything about everybody in town, and has eyes that frequently change color, and is able to repulse anybody with just a touch, but that is the real extent of the supernatural that we get. It's the characters that are really at the forefront here, and what is brought out in them when their biggest fears are shoved in their faces, and I love the way that King chose to present that with this story. It's a highly original idea and it completely works with what King was trying to say. His writing style in this book is also what most people refer to as "vintage King" - like he's slightly sophisticated but still naughty and nasty at the same time.

So what did we learn from Needful Things? Obviously, the main one is "Caveat Emptor!" You may think you are getting exactly what you want, but what are you sacrificing to get it? And what are you willing to do to keep it? Pride is a good thing to have sometimes, but remember that it is also one of the seven deadly sins. Grief is a necessity, but it's okay to move on. Questioning a loved one's death can only do more harm than good to your sanity. And finally, and maybe most importantly - drugs are bad. But you all knew that.

YOU'VE BEEN HERE BEFORE.

Review: "Bag of Bones" Miniseries (2011)

Oh-kay. How to talk about "Bag of Bones"? It's always hard for me to review an adaptation of a book I love so much and have such a strong connection to, and Bag of Bones is definitely one of those books. Most people would probably say that you have to look at the book and adaptation as two separate entities. To a point, I agree. Movies and books are different mediums and therefore must be dealt with in different ways. But when a movie has such strong source material, how can one not judge the movie based on its ability to effectively recreate what was presented in the book? Let's see how Mick Garris and crew did with my favorite Stephen King book.

Part One Review: Honestly, not much has happened so far. Jo Noonan died, Mike Noonan grieved, Mike went to Sara Laughs (even though it was never mentioned in the miniseries that Sara Laughs was the name of his lake house but whatever), Mike found out that Sara Laughs is haunted by Jo and Sara Tidwell, Mike met Mattie and Kyra, Mike got involved with Kyra's crazy grandfather Max Devore. There's still much to be covered and since they didn't get very far in the first two hours, a lot of story and action is going to have be crammed into the last two hours. Good or bad? We'll see.

I must say that the first part felt a little slow, and not necessarily suspenseful. Mike's dreams and his ghostly encounters felt like the filmmakers were just recycling the same old horror movie cliches, when in the book the mood was creepy but much more subtle. I loved the inclusion of the refrigerator magnets and Bunter's bell as how the ghosts communicate, though. Pierce Brosnan's crazed laughing about these incidents was a little weird, but Mike expresses in the book about how he is both terrified by the ghosts and a little excited at what he is experiencing as well, so I guess that fits.

I'm still not sold on Brosnan as Mike. He's a bit older looking - though that doesn't matter much - and he doesn't have Mike's sarcastic sense of humor or overall way with words (he's a writer, remember). The actors playing Max Devore and his yet-unnamed "assistant" Rogette are also quite good so far, though they haven't had much to do. Max has just the right amount of cunning and evil behind his eyes, just how I pictured him from the book and Rogette is perhaps even creepier looking than I pictured.

The big change I got pissed off about noticed was how Jo died. In the book, she has a brain aneurysm in a parking lot and Mike wasn't there. In the show, she gets hit by a fucking bus. I understand the need for making things a little more dramatical or whatever but this is going a bit far. And to have Mike running out and holding his bleeding and dying wife? I don't know that they should have gone for that big of a change for the sake of drama. It was too gruesome for me, but I admit that it did manage to hurry the story up a bit and get Mike to Sara Laughs, so I'm letting it slide for the moment.

A couple things I did like: Really liked the dream sequence where Mike kisses Sara, Jo, and Mattie. It set up for the audience who the important players were in this piece and was quite beautifully shot. Also really liked the actress playing Sara Tidwell. She's absolutely gorgeous, and if that was really her singing in that one scene, then she's pretty freaking talented, too. Though Part One is starting out a bit dull, I'm excited to see how the dramatic events of the conclusion play out. Time for Part Two!

Part Two Review: NO! No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Part One may have taken a few liberties with the story and changed things around a bit, but Part Two done fucked the whole thing up. What I'm complaining about though, is not just that they changed stuff (although, yes, I was very annoyed at some of the changes). The real problem with this was the way everything was handled. All the action went down too quickly and they seemed to treat the audience like they were stupid.

What I mean by this is that at several parts, they had characters literally spell out what was happening instead of revealing it in a better way and letting the audience figure it out for themselves. The worst part was in the scene of what happened to Sara Tidwell. They actually had a bloody Sara say to the men, "I curse you! You will kill your daughters! Your sons will kill their daughters! And so on and so forth!" before she died. Ri-donk-ulous. What, is she a witch now or something? Mattie had to actually say to Mike, "That's why Jo didn't tell you she was pregnant! She knew about the curse!" What about the fact that all the children's names that the men killed started with a "K" like Sara's daughter Keisha (in the book, it was a son and his name was Kito)? All those little facts just make the mystery seem more involved and bigger and more powerful than the miniseries made it out to be.

I did love that they included one of my favorite parts from the book, which was when Mike met Rogette and Max on The Street and Rogette starts throwing rocks at Mike in the lake. It was a much longer scene in the book and always felt a little ludicrous to me, but also very funny and showed how crazy those two were. I actually had an actress in my mind for Rogette while reading the book - Marian Seldes.

I'm telling you, when that chick gets angry, she is the scariest-looking person on the planet. The other lady is great in the role, though, and she has a great look with that black hair and costuming. 

I admit that Bag of Bones was probably a hard novel to adapt. Much of it centered on Mike alone and his inner monologue which is not only difficult to translate to film but it also would have been very boring to watch Pierce Brosnan get scared at ghosts for a couple hours. Some scenes were great, like the dream sequence of Mike and Kyra at the fair but other important scenes were either watered down for TV or hyped up too much to make them more exciting.

A couple random comments: Rogette kissing Max in the bathtub before she killed him? Ew! She's supposed to be his daughter! They don't say that in the show but for people who've read the book and know that fact, this was a very weird little scene. Also liked the reference to Lisey's Story when Mike mentions "Booya Moon." Liked Mattie's death scene - that bullet wound in her cheek was horrendous. Did not like the scene where Mattie Devore appears to her daughter formed out of water. Too silly for my tastes.

On the whole, though, "Bag of Bones" was a complete failure. There was too much information that they tried to cram into the last two hours and the result was something very sloppy. This book is really so much better than the miniseries made it out to be. I know that must be annoying to hear, but I have mad love for this novel - it is probably my favorite book, period - and I think the story is so beautiful and heartbreaking and this adaptation does it no justice. Mick Garris, you are hereby banned from adapting anymore of King's work. Leave it to Frank Darabont, because believe me, he does a helluva better job than you.

"Bag of Bones" Miniseries Starts Tonight!

Mick Garris takes another shot at adapting Stephen King's work with the premiere of the two night event of "Bag of Bones" starting tonight at 8 pm! Bag of Bones is probably my very favorite King novel and I have been awaiting an adaptation pretty much ever since I first read it. The miniseries stars Pierce Brosnan and Melissa George in the lead roles (Brosnan was definitely not who I had in mind for Mike Noonan, but George fits well as Mattie) about a man who retreats to his vacation home after the sudden death of his wife.

Is the miniseries a better form for King's work? Will they stay close to the source material? Will I ever like anything as much as the book? I guess I'll find out tonight (and tomorrow night...)!

Anybody else out there plan on watching this? What are your thoughts on what you've seen so far?

Random Stephen King-ness: The Dead Zone (Viking, 1979)

I used to be a big reader, and would pick up a book whenever I had any kind of free time and, to use a cliche, get lost in the story between the pages. Now the only time I can get my lazy brain to pick up a book is at work when I'm on lunch break. 

Anyway. I haven't bought any new books lately so I had to grab something off my shelf the other day to take to work for said lunch break. My Stephen King bookshelf is always a good place to look for something to read that I know I'm going to like. I hadn't read The Dead Zone in several years so I was excited to become reacquainted with it. And when I was done, I realized how completely in love with this book I am.

The Dead Zone is the story of Johnny Smith, who is in a terrible car accident the night he takes his girlfriend, Sarah, to the county fair. He falls into a coma and doesn't awaken until four and a half years passes. Johnny soon finds out that not only has the world changed, but he has too. When he touches a person or object, he gets psychic visions of future or past events - usually not good events. As Johnny recovers, this new "gift" allows him to help several people, but when he gets a terrifying vision of the world from an up-and-coming politician, he has to make the hardest decision of his life.

Anthony Michael Hall as John Smith in
The Dead Zone TV series

This book absolutely KILLS me. I read one completely unbelievable review of someone who didn't like this book because it was too "depressing." The reviewer wanted more psychic-vision-action and less emotional humdrum. While I hate to badger someone for their opinion, I cannot agree with or understand this. Anonymous reviewer, I give you Literature Lesson No. 1: The Dead Zone is a tragedy and Johnny Smith is its tragic hero. Which means that bad shit will happen, especially to the hero, and things will not work out all right in the end.

Johnny is much more than the main character of the piece, he is the element that the whole book hinges on. What Stephen King created here is probably his most successful and sympathetic character EVER. Quite simply, you have to like this person or the book just does not work. John Smith (no middle initial), as the name suggests, is the epitome of the Everyman. He is an average, nice guy who loves his girlfriend, his parents, and his job as a high school teacher. Everything he says and the way he deals with the situations he is thrust into makes you like and respect the man all the more. And hopefully it kills you just as much as it does me the way people treat him and the physical and emotional torture he goes through throughout the course of the book.

Actually, the only time that Johnny sways from his good demeanor is while he's having the visions. Sometimes he is able to essentially become the people he is seeing - most famously when he informs Sheriff Bannerman that deputy Frank Dodd is the Castle Rock strangler, a serial killer who has raped and strangled several women over the past few years. While handling evidence from one of the crime scenes, Johnny is put in Dodd's place, speaking in a scary voice, voicing Dodd's thoughts during the murder. This, and other incidents during Johnny's visions, hurts other people's perceptions of him, frightening those who witness it. 

Then there are the other people who treat Johnny like crap because of his visions. Of course it's logical that people wouldn't believe him. A real, honest-to-goodness psychic? Sounds like something out of a Stephen King novel. But all the detractors and people that attack him personally for what he can do makes the reader angry. He has helped people - saved a person's house from burning, caught a sadistic murderer, found a doctor's long lost mother - and still people avoid him like the plague. Even those who believe him don't want to be around him, don't want him touching them for fear of what he might see about themselves. 

Johnny never wants the limelight or even recognition for what he can do. His reaction to his most violent visions is instinctual - to help people. Even as reporters and anonymous letters call him a fraud and a terrible human being, it doesn't really seem to faze him because he never asked for any of this. He doesn't want to use his new power, but when he sees something truly frightening, he can't help but to try to help because that's just the kind of man he is, detractors be damned. The way he handles himself with these people just breaks your heart because we as the reader of course know he's not a fake and therefore we are always on his side, and we immediately loathe anybody who says something against this wonderful man that we have come to love.

Over time, Johnny begins to deteriorate. King describes other people's thoughts of him: a skinny, frail, and sickly looking man that probably doesn't have much time left. And Johnny knows it. As he investigates the politician who will bring about nuclear war, Greg Stillson, he knows this is his last chance to act on his most important vision. His attempt to assassinate Stillson fails/succeeds, as he doesn't kill Stillson but does manage to ruin his political career forever. Johnny dies shortly after - yes, the main character that we have loved and sympathized with through this whole book, whom we wanted nothing but good things to happen to, succumbs to the inevitable fate of the tragic hero. 

Christopher Walken as Johnny Smith in
David Cronenberg's film version of The Dead Zone.

His mission essentially accomplished, how should we feel about this hero's demise? His head injury as a child, coupled with the car crash in his twenties and the toll the visions take, allow a brain tumor to form. His miraculous recovery from his coma was apparently not meant to last, as fate (and perhaps a higher power) had other things in store for him. And Johnny should be admired for what he did with his second chance, even though we are sad and angry about what he had to go through.

So what I'm trying to say here is that I admire and love what King has created. As a literary device, I don't understand why Johnny Smith and The Dead Zone is not studied in English classes. Seriously. More than Hamlet, this is a tragedy of our time and even though it was written 30 years ago, all these events could just as easily happen today. John Smith is the ultimate sympathetic character, who deals with adversity and difficult decisions with integrity and strength and then must pay for his choices. He's one of the best characters Stephen King ever came up with and one that should be looked up to and studied.

Deadly Dogs Week: Cujo (1983)

You didn't think I'd leave out the mother of all killer dog movies, did you? Of course not! It's a simple but well told story and came from the brilliant mind of my God, Stephen King (although even he admits that he was high as a fucking kite at the time and doesn't remember writing the book). Over 20 years since its release, Cujo still packs a pretty good punch.

Hopefully you don't need much of a synopsis for this one but it's become part of the format for my posts so here's a very short one: Donna and her young son Tad become stranded in their broken down Pinto by a rabid Saint Bernard. My review here is going to be less about the movie as a whole but rather some specific elements of it that I've always thought were intriguing.

Watching the movie again, there is a long setup until we get to the Camber house and all hell breaks loose with Cujo and poor Donna and Tad in the middle of it. This setup is necessary though to make the situation seem realistic and believable. We have to know that Joe Camber was planning to go out of town and stopped his mail. We have to know about Charity wanting to get her and her son away from Joe for a while so that no one knew something was wrong with Cujo until it was too late. We have to know about Vic's also going out of town and Donna's extramarital affair so that Vic thinks there's another possible reason for Donna's absence when he comes back home.

As the book mentions several times, there are a lot of factors that come into play that make this unique situation possible. Otherwise, you'd have people saying "Well why didn't they do this..." all through the movie. So the prolonged setup here in the movie is important both story-wise and in building suspense. But then I guess the biggest question of all is why didn't Donna call Joe Camber to make sure he'd be at his house before she took that piece of car way out there in the first place???

I actually love the earlier scenes where Cujo is just beginning to feel his sickness and you can tell that it is really hurting him. The little movements that they got the dog to do totally portrayed the progression of the rabies infection. Hopefully it also makes you feel a little sorry for Cujo, as well, because he is very much the victim of the story along with being the villain.

A word about Danny Pintauro as Tad Trenton. This kid absolutely KILLS in this movie. When I see a child acting as real and amazing as little Danny does in Cujo, I'm of the mind that maybe kids make better actors than adults overall. When he's all gaunt and pale-looking and crouched in the back of the Pinto screaming his head off while Cujo attacks his mother? Forget about it. It is his acting that sells most of the scenes in the car and he is perhaps the catalyst for Donna's actions. She might have given up or done something stupid a lot sooner if she didn't have her son to think about. Plus, his being brought back from the brink of death sort of becomes the redemptive factor for Donna and Vic's relationship.

Oh, the poor Pinto. Often known for being pretty much the worst car ever made, it is also gloriously immortalized as Donna and Tad's other captor in Cujo. The car is the reason they become stranded and does absolutely nothing to alleviate their situation, as it becomes an oven baking them in the heat and increasingly smaller and more uncomfortable. There is a great 360 degree dizzying shot of the inside of the Pinto after Donna has first been attacked by Cujo. The camera turns from Donna to Tad screaming and then back to Donna and then back to Tad, spinning faster and faster until the shot is a blur. 

I've always had mixed feelings about Stephen King's choice of a Saint Bernard for the rabid dog in Cujo. On the one hand, it's a good choice because even though giving any kind of dog rabies will make them a believable foe, Saint Bernards are very large and strong. On the other hand, Saint Bernards are also known for being a relatively gentle and loyal breed, and people often say they are the best dogs for families because they are so good with children. So it kinda sucks that they're given such a bad rap in this movie. Oh well, I guess Beethoven makes up for the damage done in Cujo.

So despite any of the usual problems with older movies - aging and whatnot - I think Cujo is one that can still affect people on the visceral level and continue to wear the hat of the first and probably the best of movies that make the family pet our worst nightmare.

Alright, this concludes Deadly Dogs Week! There was another movie I wanted to do for this called Play Dead but Netflix said it was going to be a "very long wait." 

Women In Horror Month: Stephen King's Ladies

As many other bloggers out there have already said, February is Women in Horror Recognition Month, which is pretty freaking awesome. Women are an integral part of the genre, on all sides of the field, and this is an excellent way to honor and exalt them as they should be!

The Mike at the fabulous From Midnight, With Love blog is offering up some linkage opportunities to Midnight Warriors who post their thoughts on women in horror so be sure to step by there this month and see what other awesome bloggers are talking about.

For my first post on this topic, I'm starting off with what I know best.

What a cute dork.

Stephen King is known by fans for doing some pretty gruesome stuff to the characters in his books. When he takes on the task of putting a female in the lead of his story, or an otherwise important role, they are just as fair game for his twisted plot lines as the males. So here comes the list! Some are heroines, some are villains, but all of these fabulous females have been put through King's crazy shit that he thinks up and have either come out on top or gotten their bloody revenge, and for that, THEY RULE.

If you haven't read these books, I'm about to reveal some serious spoilers.


Jessie Burlingame from Gerald's Game

Jessie and her hubby Gerald were having a nice time at their cottage by the lake, until Gerald wanted to kink up their sex life. He handcuffs Jessie to the bed, but she's not into it and kicks him off of her, causing him to have a heart attack and die. Lying there naked and bound, with no one around to help her, Jessie's torment over the next several hours are both physical and emotional. She has recollections of being sexually molested by her father; watches a dog eat her dead husband's body; and deals with a frightening manifestation coming at her in the room - all while still trying to free herself from the handcuffs. In the end, she gets out of this situation in the grossest way possible by almost skinning her own hand to slip out of the handcuffs. Gross, Stephen King. GROSS. By the way, that manifestation that was stalking Jessie during her ordeal was actually a necrophiliac grave robber who is later caught by police. Somehow, I don't think that made Jessie feel better.

Sandra Stansfield from "The Breathing Method"

"The Breathing Method" is the only novella from King's collection titled Different Seasons to NOT have been adapted to film, and believe me, after reading this I think you'll understand why. "TBM" is a frame story that follows a men's club who gather around a fireplace and tell stories. One man, a doctor, tells the story of one of his patients, Sandra Stansfield. She is a single woman pregnant with the child of a married man. This happened in the 1950s, so that's not a good thing. However, Sandra is a proud woman determined to have the child and when the doctor introduces her to the new technique of Lamaze, she dutifully practices. Sandra is past her due date when she's in a terrible car accident on Christmas Eve. The doctor arrives on scene only to find out that Sandra has been decapitated in the accident. However, her body is still miraculously alive, and able to continue to do the Lamaze breathing until the doctor successfully delivers her baby. My jaw was on the floor when I first read this story. Incredibly gruesome, but still kind of sweet and uplifting? Yeah, I don't know how it's possible either, but that's how I felt.

Sara Tidwell from Bag of Bones

This is my absolute favorite King book. I've read it several times now, and it's a fantastic book to pick when you just want to read a really good story. Sara Tidwell is kind of the villain in this piece but maybe you won't blame her once you read about what Stephen King put her through. Sara was the singer of a popular African American band at the turn of the century in the town where author Mike Noonan has his summer home. Haunting experiences at his house lead Mike to uncover a curse on several families in the town which have something to do with Sara Tidwell. In a vision, Mike uncovers the horrific truth - Sara and her young son Kito were killed by a group of men by the lake. They brutally rape and murder Sara and drown her son in the lake. Since then, the descendants of the men responsible have all had tragic drownings of the firstborn child in their families - children whose names begin with "K" or "C." King graphically describes Sara's attack which is all the more brutal because of how strong and confident Sara is described as being earlier in the book. The men intend to "break" her by raping her, but her spirit proves to be quite unbreakable and very deadly.

Rose Daniels from Rose Madder

Rose's husband Norman is a police officer. He should be the perfect guy, but instead he is a vicious rage-oholic who beats Rose for 14 years before she finally leaves him one day. Rose manages to make a new life for herself and get rid of Norman for good (with the help of a woman in a painting and the other world it transports her to - hey, it's a King novel, I don't know how else to say it to make it make sense) Her character is amazing for many reasons but mostly for what she endures in the first chapter of the novel. It's an incident that occurs 9 years before Rose leaves her husband, and it's a particularly violent and disturbing incident of abuse. Rose is lying in the corner of the room, bleeding and in immense pain after Norman has punched her in the stomach. The worst part: she's four months pregnant. This one short chapter of the novel instantly sets up how truly evil Norman is as he casually eats a sandwich while cleaning up Rose's blood and smiling at her while her dead baby is leaking out of her body, assuring her that she can always have another one. Descriptive yet sickening sentences like "Something is putting sinister, slippery little kisses against the insides of her thighs" really put the reader in Rose's shoes and make you feel the unbearable pain she is going through. And you truly believe her and side with her as she vehemently repeats "I hate you" in her head.

Trisha MacFarland from The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon

If I were ever lost in the woods for days on end, I'm not sure how I could survive. The 9-year-old heroine from one of King's shortest novels surely has one up on me there. While on a hiking trip with her brother and mother, Trisha wanders off the path and when she tries taking a shortcut back to where she was, she becomes hopelessly lost. With little food and drink, her GameBoy and her Walkman, Trisha must do whatever she has to to live through this. This girl is awesome. She's only a child and still manages to keep her cool and use smart and effective methods to sustain herself until help arrives. Sure, she starts going a little loopy and imagines that an evil creature called The God of the Lost is after her, but having pneumonia and diarrhea from forest berries is bound to do that to anyone. The climax of the novel is great too. Trisha comes upon a road but not before the God of the Lost comes upon her. At least, that's what she imagines it to be, when in reality it's a freaking BEAR. Thankfully she's saved by a hunter and taken back to her family, but damn. This 9-year-old survived days in the woods and almost got her ass eaten up by a BEAR. She's way cooler than all of us. This is not one of King's more popular books, but it is interesting in that it the most straightforward narrative that he's ever written I think.

I've avoided discussing the women most obviously affiliated with King - Carrie White from Carrie, Annie Wilkes from Misery, Dolores Claiborne from Dolores Claiborne, Charlie McGee from Firestarter - because all of those novels have been made into movies and none of the above stories have. And they are some of King's best work and most interesting stories, and hopefully this will make more fans aware of King's entire body of work. I highly recommend any of the aforementioned novels (especially Bag of Bones - I SERIOUSLY love that book) to you so pick one up today and enjoy! And keep celebrating all the amazing Women in Horror!